The girl is a capricious, changeable creature. Today she wants peace and quiet, and tomorrow her energy has no limits, she gallops through the valleys and villages in search of adventure and demands power, if not over the whole world, then at least over it.Ofor the most part. What happens the day after tomorrow? You come home and find your sweet, beautiful lady of the heart (sister, girlfriend) yesterday in a terrible mood, unkempt and with a huge plate of delicious, but little compatible products in your hands. Don't be surprised, because it's "they" again - hormonal changes in the body and, as a result, PMS (premenstrual syndrome).
It does not happen to everyone, but to most girls, it has many forms and it depends directly on age (the older the woman, the more likely she is to have the syndrome). For men, the most dangerous manifestation of PMS is the neuropsychic form, which is expressed in tearfulness, irritability, mood swings, and sometimes even depression and aggressiveness, so disliked by all men. And if your beloved, for no reason at all, threw a vase at you, do not be offended, she is not evil. 🙂
Why is all this happening? It's all about the hormones that are produced by the female genital organs, namely, estrogen. The concentration of this hormone in a woman's body begins to grow from about the 7th day of the menstrual cycle, when a follicle with an egg begins to grow in the ovaries. The phase continues until the very end of the cycle (about 3 weeks) until the very menstruation, which accounts for the peak release of estrogen into the blood. It is he who affects the mood of all sexually mature young ladies.
“Why is it needed at all, this estrogen?” - you ask. I will answer that it is simply necessary, since it is this hormone that makes a woman a woman. It is estrogen that is responsible for the formation of secondary sexual characteristics, the female type of figure, female character and voices. Without it, girls will not be such sweet, beautiful and gentle creatures.
Therefore, on such days you need to be very delicate in relation to your girlfriend, you need to listen and, most importantly, hear her, indulge her whims a little, buy chocolates and show in every possible way that you care about what happens to her, even if she shows with her whole appearance, that you annoy her. Also, you should not be offended by your girlfriend if her decisions and desires change at the speed of sound. But as far as possible, bring her what you want, because otherwise she is unlikely to fall behind you, and also be offended in addition. If a girl cries for no reason, then there are two options: console or not touch at all. Which one to choose, see for yourself according to the situation, it's like in the old films about the "hard nut": the wire is either red or blue, but not both at once. If you make a mistake, it can "bang". And you don't need it. True, there is a danger of being a "soulless beast", but it's not as scary as getting hit on the head with a vase, right?
A small survey was conducted among girls aged 18-22 about what comforts them during PMS. The results are not at all diverse and even boring: understanding, food, sex, sleep, tears. It seems like ordinary desires, but at such moments feel free to multiply everything by a hundred. Better than a thousand. Your representative of the fair sex behaves like a small child only one day a month, but for the sake of her beauty and health, this can be tolerated.
I hope this article has shed some light on why girls act weird during PMS and how to smooth things over and help your loved one cope. For a girl, the main thing is to understand that she is not alone. And who knows, perhaps this is the main reason for all her eccentricities.
No matter how you resist, sooner or later women will enter your life. And then you get to know them from the bad side. The bad side of them, like werewolves, manifests itself with frightening cyclicality and is called PMS. You must know this enemy by sight and be able to fight back.
Maxim Rafstein
Nowadays, only the most desperate and, as a rule, lonely male denies the existence of such a destructive natural phenomenon as premenstrual syndrome, which we familiarly call PMS. Some half a century ago, this abbreviation seemed no less mystical than UFOs, and now PMS has not only taken pride of place in the work of photojab artists, but has also been officially recognized by the World Health Organization.
If PMS were a microbe invading a woman's brain and pulling levers there (we are just patenting this scenario), it would be easy to do away with it. But PMS is provoked by a violent dance of hormones. We will not only tell you in detail what PMS is and what it is fraught with, but we will also teach you how to predict its approach and effectively deal with it. After all, you deserve an objective attitude that does not depend on hormones. No one else will call you a "cruel soulless beast" for no reason!
During PMS, your girlfriend may:
Cry unexpectedly;
get covered with pimples;
get annoyed over trifles;
wanting to sleep all the time;
swell (there is an increase in weight up to 2 kg);
eat without stopping.
But if you love her anyway (or still owe her for the car), you will certainly cope with these unpleasant, as well as temporary difficulties.
Theoretical part
Pulp Fiction
If you still think PMS is a woman's invention, speak up in an English court where PMS is used as extenuating circumstance. The first such precedent was recorded in the 1980s, when 18-year-old Anna Reynolds, who killed her mother, proved that she was worried at the time of the PMS crime and lightened her sentence to “negligent homicide.” 29-year-old bartender Sandy Craddock killed a colleague and was awaiting a sentence behind bars. The guards watching her found that every 29 days, Sandy came into conflict with other prisoners or cut her wrists. Taking into account the strong effect of PMS on Sandy, the court qualified her case as "negligent homicide." But in Russia, PMS is not recognized as a mitigating circumstance. Till. (Sinister music.)To better understand how to deal with the symptoms of PMS, it's a good idea to start by understanding, so to speak, the origins of the problem. PMS is a complex of physical and behavioral symptoms that occurs 2 to 10 days before a period, exclusively in women of childbearing age. The existence of PMS was written by the Roman physician Soranus of Ephesus in the 2nd century AD. e. In his large-scale work Gynecology, he mentions that "shortly before bleeding" women begin to experience various unpleasant symptoms, such as swelling of the limbs, drowsiness, sluggishness, and even "reddening of the cheeks."
Since Soran of Ephesus had already died, we turned for advice to another doctor - a candidate of medical sciences, an obstetrician-gynecologist at the Clinic + 31 medical center Madina Kuchukova. And this is what she told us: “Today, the hormonal theory of the development of PMS prevails. Estrogen levels rise, which causes hypoglycemia, which is characterized by fatigue. At the same time, the level of the hormone progesterone decreases and fluid retention in the body begins. Our specialist also found a scientific explanation for why a girl during PMS acquires the habit of dropping your priceless vinyl collection from the 16th floor: “Sex hormones affect the production of an important peptide in the pituitary gland - melanostimulating hormone. This hormone, interacting with endorphin, can increase the production of aldosterone, which causes a lot of changes in the body, including mood changes. Madina also told us what to expect from a girl experiencing PMS.
Practical part
You must be on the alert, do not let the enemy sneak up unnoticed. If one sunny morning you find that not only were you not fed breakfast, but they put you out the door with a rocking chair and three children, blame yourself entirely. Timely recognized PMS will significantly reduce your losses.
Of course, we do not expect you to mark the cycle of women close to you in a pocket calendar. After all, we live in the 21st century: websites have long been invented for everything! Register on pmsbuddy.com. Enter the data on the expected start of PMS of five women, from mistress to concierge, and the site will send you a monthly warning of an impending disaster. Then follow our instructions below. And may a leaky bicycle horn (or whatever talisman you have) help you!
Good idea
Let her be alone
It's time to visit your parents or your favorite zebra at the zoo. In the early stages of PMS in women, testosterone levels increase. One of the results of the process is the desire for solitude. It is not safe to violate the natural needs of her body - we recommend that you withdraw yourself for a while.
Send her to play sports
Give her a one-time certificate to the gym, which was allegedly given to you by colleagues, clients or mom. Michelle Beck, author of The Taming of the Monthly Witch, argues that "exercise can reduce anxiety, mood swings, and other mood symptoms of PMS through the happy hormone endorphins released into the blood during exercise."
Fill the refrigerator with special food, or even cook dinner
Our expert Madina Kuchukova recommends that you pay special attention to foods containing magnesium, vitamins B6 and C. “Vitamin B6 and magnesium are essential for normal functioning nervous system Madina explains. “Vitamin C has an antioxidant and immunostimulatory effect, which is very timely, since immunity is weakened during PMS.” So we advise you to stock up on eggs, cereals, legumes, nuts, shrimp, liver, lamb, chicken and kiwi. But the theory that a woman should be cajoled with chocolate during PMS has not stood up to scrutiny. “Foods such as cheese, coffee, and chocolate during PMS can trigger anxiety, migraines, and palpitations,” the doctor explained to us.
Don't wake her up at dawn
You can even resort to a dirty game and turn off the mobile on her iPhone. Better she be late for work in the morning than have time to make a scandal in the evening. “A woman during PMS should sleep for 8-9 hours,” doctor Kuchukova authoritatively tells us. “Lack of sleep exacerbates anxiety and other negative emotions, and increases irritability.”
Play her a romantic comedy
Since she still needs to laugh, cry and blow her nose, let her do it with the help of the visiting Adam Sandler.
Take on some household chores
Let all 58 years that you have a non-committal relationship, it was she who washes, cleans, polishes, waxes and mastic, but during her PMS days you should take on some of the household chores. Spread the sock on the dryer, wash the fork, throw the ball to the cat - everything is better than listening to reproaches once again.
Massage her neck
“Sudden levels of estrogen can cause premenstrual migraines, which are exacerbated by loud noises and bright lights,” says Stefan Jaskel, author of The Men’s Guide to PMS. He also gives a detailed massage technique, which we have reduced to one sentence: massage the girl’s neck from the back (otherwise she will think that you decided to strangle her), pressing on the area at the base of the skull. There are muscles that can be massaged to relieve headaches.
Surround her with pleasant scents
A woman with PMS is especially sensitive to smells. You can just throw out the kebab that your friends gave you for graduation from the refrigerator, or you can go further. “The scents of vanilla, strawberry and lavender act like an aphrodisiac for a woman,” Stefan Jaskel confided to us. Just in case, get shower gels with the mentioned smells (so be it, except for strawberries).
Show concern
"Aren't you too tired?" "Is the pillow soft enough?" "Will you wash another watermelon?" - these fussy questions can turn you in her eyes from a useless piece of hairy meat into a knight in slippers in a matter of seconds.
Agree to sex if she demands
In the early stages of PMS in women, testosterone levels rise sharply, the main male hormone. Stefan Jaskel explains: "Testosterone is responsible for her craving for aggressive sex, initiative, and showing dominance in relationships." Do not try to refer to a headache and fatigue - she will ask in a good way only once.
Bad and very bad idea
Travel far and away
This decision is not only unsportsmanlike, but also dangerous. A woman with PMS should not be stewed in her own juice for a long time. She will think that you are deliberately avoiding her (which is true, but it is better for her not to know). Upon your return, you will face a scandal with accusations like "I could have died, and you would have been late for my funeral and never met my mother."
Do sports together
Only a chronically self-confident woman (and this species is on the verge of extinction) can afford to sweat in front of the opposite sex during PMS. Now she feels fatter, clumsier, redder and ruffled than usual. She doesn't like herself. It pisses her off. With a high probability, she will take out her anger on the male, dashingly jumping with a racket on the other side of the court.
Throw a surprise party
If you think that a few dozen best friends and unfamiliar people sauntering around your home in colored caps will prevent her from throwing a scandal at you, you are fatally mistaken. Against. Any party is stressful, and any stress during PMS is fraught. “Delay big events and big news until the best moment when she is back in her mind. “Play hostess” is now at the bottom of her priority list,” explains author Stephanie Eldred of Askmen.com’s “Manage Her PMS.”
Giving her alcohol in the hope of putting her to sleep
Alcohol goes from being your ally to becoming your enemy when you pour it on a woman experiencing PMS. Moreover, one should not hope that alcohol will calm, or even lull a person who is at the epicenter of a hormonal storm. Michelle Beck insists that "alcohol and cigarettes exacerbate PMS symptoms." You run the risk of getting a drunken fury who wants to sort things out before dawn. Hide the bottle.
Take to an exhibition of military photographs
Any strong shocks during PMS will inevitably lead to the fact that she will begin to ask providential questions: “Why do people kill each other?”, “Will descendants remember us?”, “Should we part with him right at the exhibition?”. Trust me, you don't want to answer them.
Behave exactly as usual
Ignoring the testosterone glowing ominously in her eyes is, to say the least, shortsighted. Here's what Stephanie Eldred thinks about this: "Avoid ordinary conflicts - because of the ill-fated raised toilet seat, overflowing basket with dirty laundry - if you know that she is looking for any opportunity to raise a cry."
Touch her chest
Yes, it looks great. Just the way it should be. No more and no less. Touch and touch. But no, during PMS, a woman's own breasts become a heavy burden for a woman. It not only increases, but also hurts, itches and does other not-too-pleasant things that you don’t need to know about. Sad but true: you can only admire visually.
eat garlic
Unfortunately, now is not the time for your famous Durian Garlic Brie Pie. If usually unpleasant odors irritate a girl, they can provoke a tantrum in a girl with PMS. Do not risk.
Joking about PMS, saying you understand her condition, or bringing up hot topics
Telling a PMS joke to a woman with PMS is like telling a bald friend a bald joke. Tell a joke about PMS to a bald friend. Too much empathy is also not worth it. The more research on PMS, the more women brag about their position. Reporting to a girl that you understand her condition, you, firstly, are lying, and secondly, you are depriving her of a sense of exclusivity. And, of course, it’s not worth sharing thoughts about the extinction of the institution of marriage with her now either.
Demand sex if she doesn't want to
The Men's Guide to PMS reports to us that "progesterone, which decreases during PMS, kills a woman's desires and reduces her body's production of pheromones." That is, she does not want to, and you no longer find your frowning girlfriend attractive. Looking for sex where it doesn't smell is a thankless task.
Emotion Graph
TUR decided to find out why the girls suffer so much, and the guys along with them. We understand what these terrible three letters represent from a medical point of view and find out how women cope with the problem, and guys deal with women who have PMS.
What is premenstrual syndrome?
PMS, or cyclical syndrome, which is also called premenstrual illness, is a complex set of symptoms that does not appear in all women a few days before the onset of menstruation. PMS is characterized by emotional instability, mental lability, impaired state of the autonomic nervous system and a number of other changes, which, in turn, negatively affect the habitual household adaptation of both the woman and the man next to her.
There are so-called PMS trigger factors - triggering mechanisms and disease-provoking agents. Such factors can serve as childbirth, abortion and diseases in the female part, as well as stress and infection. However, the exact cause of the development of this condition, scientists have not yet dug to the bottom. One thing is known - someone has PMS all the time, someone has it from time to time, and some lucky women are completely deprived of this unpleasant feature.
At the anatomical level, the focus is known - it is the hypothalamus. Doctors advise treating PMS with drugs, hormones and a kind word.
If a girl is not in the mood
And every phrase sounds like an attack
Need to move away quickly
And throw a big chocolate bar at her
We figured out that PMS is not “my abnormal breakdown again,” but quite a disease. Which, as befits any proper disease, has several forms:
Neuropsychic- which we started talking about. It is with this form that a woman develops a bad mood, tearfulness, depression, severe irritability and often aggression towards her neighbor.
edematous- with this form, there may not be a change in the emotional background, but sensitivity to odors increases, the mammary glands engorge, and edema appears. It is not known which is better.
Cephalgic - here comes to the fore headache, often pulsating. At the same time, depression and various vegetative manifestations are not uncommon. Arterial pressure does not change, the headache resembles a migraine in nature.
Crisis - characterized by increased pressure, tachycardia, arrhythmia, fatigue, fear of death. Emotional condition with this form is not the best.
Atypical form - like a ghost or true love Everyone talks about her, but few have seen her.
How Ufa couples cope with PMS
Svetlana and Andrey
Svetlana: I don't consider PMS a disease. Yes, shortly before the beginning of menstruation, I have breakdowns. I know in advance what days it will be and I warn others not to be offended by me. It's not their fault that my hormones are playing. Feelings at the same time are different, as a rule I feel strong irritability, everything infuriates me, I want to hit someone hard. This condition lasts for a maximum of two days, after which it gradually fades away.
Andrey: When Sveta has PMS, I "go on the defensive." She lashes out at me with reproaches, she doesn’t like anything, absolutely nothing, what I do. True, she later apologizes for breaking loose, and I don’t take offense, I understand everything. So I try not to annoy her once again. Sometimes I buy something tasty, order pizza or rolls, take me to a cafe. She reacts positively to these ideas even in PMS.
Dasha and Sergey
Dasha: Everyone around says - "Nightmare! PMS! And this is not clear to me. My mood, emotional and physical state actually do not depend on the passage of the monthly cycle. Everything as usual. Bad mood and irritability are sometimes characteristic of me, but ... at any time of the month, and not on any specific days.
Sergei: We are lucky in this regard. If you hadn't asked that question, I would never have thought about it.
Aigul and Radik
Aigul: I don't know, like, everything is as usual ...
R: Yep, like she usually does. But I don't have. From the side you can see better. She becomes totally inadequate. She swears… She likes it, and in a minute she doesn’t like the same thing – she “changed her mind”! And she also has a stupid habit these days - not to call and go somewhere with her girlfriends. No, I have nothing against it, but can I call, warn? Why call there - at least pick up the phone. In short, it's a pipe.
Karina and Anton
Karina: During PMS my head hurts wildly and I hate everyone around me. I can yell at my mother, at my husband, at my daughter. By the way, it appeared after the birth of the first child. Before that, it didn't show up at all. I do not know what it is connected with. Save only pills and an hour or two of sleep in silence and in the dark. However, my husband got used to it.
A: Everything is simple. There is a fast-acting remedy for all manifestations of PMS - shopping. You give her money and let her go shopping. The main rule is not to go with her! To be honest, I'm not sure that my wife has this PMS at all, it seems that she just likes that we have such a tradition every month - to send her for a new blouse.
Alena and Kirill
Alyona: My PMS is relatively quiet. Sometimes I don’t notice at all, sometimes I feel a little irritable. Considering that I am a very positive person in life, I immediately notice that something abnormal is happening to me. And I'm talking about it right now. I myself feel that this is a pathology, that in normal times I never react so sharply to this or that. This is unpleasant, but I simply save myself - I cook something tasty for myself and my husband, watch a comedy or a fairy tale, read a book - in general, I do something that pleases me.
Kirill: The wife in this regard is a trouble-free creation! Chocolate in the teeth - and it is white and fluffy.
Irina and Airat
Irina: I get fat during PMS. Seriously, it's only for those stupid three days that I get as fat as a cow. Well, that's why the mood is deteriorating - I'm always afraid that I will remain fat. I went to a gynecologist and an endocrinologist. They say - swelling, but this does not make it easier, because it looks terrible. Although it passes quickly
Airat: Yes, she herself will come up with horror stories and rushing. Never noticed anything like it. Everything is fine with her, only she becomes suspicious these days.
During menstruation, women experience many unpleasant sensations: cramps, bloating, constipation, headaches and, of course, mood swings. When watching a loved one who is menstruating, you may decide that there is nothing you can do to help. But, in fact, there are some things you can do to help a woman feel better. To start, help relieve physical symptoms by buying pain relievers and fiber-rich foods from the drugstore. Then support the woman emotionally and help her around the house.
Steps
Help relieve physical symptoms
- She can take ibuprofen 400 mg (or aspirin 600 mg) every 4 to 6 hours as needed.
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Offer her a heating pad. If your girlfriend/wife prefers natural methods of relieving symptoms, give her a filled heating pad to place on her lower abdomen to relieve cramps. You can buy several disposable heating pads at the drugstore, or you can make your own heating pad by filling a sock with rice and tying off the loose end.
- Warm the rice-filled sock in microwave oven(1-2 minutes).
- Homemade heating pads should not be left on for more than 30 minutes, but disposable heating pads sold in pharmacies can be left on for up to 8 hours.
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Buy fiber-rich foods. Sometimes women suffer from constipation during their period, so prepare high-fiber foods for her in advance. Examples include foods such as raspberries, pears, broccoli, lentils, brown rice, and whole grains. Don't force her to eat everything at once if she doesn't want to. If she likes foods that are richer complex carbohydrates buy her whole grain waffles with fruit sliced on top.
Keep away salty foods and alcohol. Certain foods increase dehydration, bloating, and other uncomfortable symptoms. If you're cooking or shopping, avoid overly salty foods (like potato chips and french fries) and alcoholic beverages. However, if she specifically asks you to buy her such products, don't treat her like a child. Just offer some useful alternatives.
Encourage her to drink more water. Dehydration can cause stomach cramps, so make sure you get enough at home. drinking water. If you see that the bottle is running out of water, fill it up. Or just pour some water into a glass and place it on the coffee table before sitting down to watch a movie together.
Give her a massage. Offer your girlfriend/wife a back or foot massage. This will help reduce the pain of cramps and show that you care about her. Ask if she wants you to give her a massage, but don't be offended if she says no. Perhaps she just wants to be left alone for a while.
Go for a walk together. Perhaps your girlfriend / wife does not want any physical activity, but a little physical activity will help relieve not only pain and heaviness, but also some other symptoms of PMS. Instead of asking her to go to the gym, ask her if she wants to go for a walk with you. You don't need to explain the reason why you suddenly decided to go for a walk, because she may be offended that you are forcing her to engage in physical activity.
Buy her ibuprofen or aspirin. Women often experience painful cramps during their period, so ibuprofen or aspirin can help ease the discomfort. If she doesn't have any painkillers on hand, go to the pharmacy and get her some painkillers. Ask if she wants to take them now, if she says no, just leave the pills on the table where she can see them for sure.
Support her emotionally
- Listen calmly to any complaints, of which there will be many during her period, and then tell her that you are sorry that she has to go through all this.
- Never use expressions such as "crazy" or "sick" when referring to her behavior during this period. During the period of menstruation, a woman is more emotional due to hormonal fluctuations in the body, but, in fact, she is as smart and rational as before.
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Ask her if she wants to be alone. During this period, she may want to lie on the couch with you, and after a few minutes she will want to be alone. Don't think you know exactly what she needs. Gently and calmly ask her if she wants to be alone for a while. If not, try to give her as much attention as possible so she doesn't feel unwanted.
- If she wants to be alone, respect her desire. But it's still worth it to show that you think of her by writing her a sweet message or letter if you live separately.
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Reduce communication. Most likely, the girl will not be in the mood to communicate much during her period, so do not put pressure on her. Better order it favourite dish and watch a movie together at home. If she is more tired than usual, suggest that she go to bed early.
- If you're close enough to want to support a girl during her period, don't plan any major events during that time. Cancel the hike/beach walk because girls have to dress up or dress in a special way for such events.
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Take on some of the household chores. If your girlfriend/wife has severe convulsions, chances are she just won't physically be able to do a lot of housework. Show care: wash the dishes, do laundry, buy groceries, cook food and clean the house. Even if your girlfriend / wife is not so hurt and bad, if she sees how you help her with household chores, she will certainly feel loved and valued.
Be patient. This is a difficult period for both of you. Do not go crazy, even if you think that her requests and behavior are unreasonable, but you should not without hesitation fulfill all her whims, simply because you do not want to swear. Take a deep breath when you cannot understand her behavior, remember that it will pass soon. In most cases, menstruation lasts three to five days, but for some women it lasts up to a week.
Act like an adult. Don't joke about how she's feeling and her symptoms. Don't make it too obvious that your period is making you uncomfortable. She might want to talk to you about what she's going through, but she might not. Wait for her to take the initiative, and if she wants to talk, take her words seriously, ask questions about the various symptoms she has.
How should a man behave when a girl has PMS
Main mistake
that men do when PMS rolled over a woman is hiding in dugouts and trenches, sitting in dachas, and also pulling their heads into their shoulders. What will happen to you: you will be taken out. From any place and state. The extraction procedure will be unpleasant.
Main feelings:
it will seem to you that they are sawing your retracted head, and then blowing up the unfinished one.
How does a woman feel about it?
rage, loneliness, jealousy, resentment, and I really want a Kalashnikov in my hands. And, sobbing, shoot you for being such a bastard.
What to do right in the early stages
.
Write down the text of SMS on a piece of paper if you managed to be out of reach.
Write:
"You are my girl. The only one (!). As soon as dad and I fix the car (as soon as Kolya and I move the closet), I will immediately be near you. What can you bring?" If they send you (“Beast, I don’t need anything from you!”) in response to this, then the initial stage has already passed and you are at the epicenter.
What to do right at the epicenter:
nothing will help you. Wait until she starts to sob and send the above SMS again. Just add "I have a surprise for you." Chocolate should be a surprise. Do not give perfume - during this period, the perception of the smell changes and in general the head hurts from smells.
If you're within reach, just listen to her. Here, just stand somewhere behind the door frame so that it doesn’t fly into your head, and listen to her. Do not lift your eyebrows, do not chuckle, do not say "what nonsense" - the degree of the storm will soar by an order of magnitude. In general, it is better to hide your face and be silent. Then get out of there and try to get close enough to her to hug her. Rock it. Ride to sleep. Whisper sweetly. If you're scared and can't do it, you'll have to endure PMS for a few more hours. Be a brave man. Cowards next to a woman have nothing to do.
What to do super right. But it is very difficult (PMS is generally for the brave). Just be with her.
What you can not do and say in no case: do not mention any female names and in general the female gender. Dad, Kolya, brother, nephew - good. God forbid you say "colleague".
You can’t say “I don’t want”, “I can’t”, “I won’t” and “I don’t understand”. If you don't believe me, try it and see what happens.
You can not talk at the initial stage about your feelings. Forget about them. In response to "I love you" you can get "I do not believe." "Forgive me" will mean that you have something to forgive and you are aware of this. The best thing they said to me recently was "I'll do anything." Talk about next steps. Even if you have already fled in horror to Zimbabwe. "I'll hug you soon." "I'll buy whatever you want, let's make a list together." "I'll cook dinner now, and you take a bath."
Never tell a PMS woman that she has PMS. "Sunny, you have PMS, drink drops" - "Drink your damn drops yourself!"
Don't joke and don't joke. In general, save you from trying to reduce everything to a joke! Women in PMS have NO sense of humor! She has: tragedy, no one loves her, she is to blame for everyone, she is terrible, the most terrible in the world, you left her, even if you are holding her leg at that time. Life didn't work out. In case you're wondering, PMS is sometimes accompanied by curious sensations that make a woman go wild.
For example, for me personally, time slows down. It's been a week for you, but for me it's a month. Cars do not move at traffic lights. Everyone is doing everything very slowly. Pauses between words hang for years. Everything starts to get in the way physically. I kept banging my hip against the corner of the table, hissing, but enduring. During PMS, I took my husband's saw and sawed off the corner in a swoop. Horror, right? Some people eat buckets of ice cream or spend huge sums on shopping, but not me. Comforts.
If a woman is full of temperament, her PMS will also be temperamental. Well, it still hurts. I want sweet, salty and meat with blood. Make sure that the meat with blood is not yours.
Let's go further. Two remain the right means with which you need to complete all kinds of PMS: chocolate and sex.
Buy chocolate. Show her from a distance. Approach at arm's length. Feed the woman. While she is eating, you have two options: start gently stroking her in places you know. If she hisses and kicks, and your chocolate flies into a corner, you are left with the last option:
break it down and fuck it.
You will need to endure a little resistance and angry screams, but when you defeat her on all fronts, she will eat your chocolate bar and cling to you. You are guaranteed a calm, quiet week.
What will happen if you choose to run away, argue (only inexperienced youths do this), get annoyed (you have no chance at all here) or make fun of her, or - horror - resort to logic.
Do you know what will happen?
There will be a next PMS.
And you will be remembered there. You will either have to run away all the time with your hair standing on end in all places, or already live as an anchorite, also to me, Onegin. You will achieve that a woman will love and respect her cat more than you.
What You Absolutely Need to Survive PMS
: PATIENCE. Kiloton.
What you need to know:
PMS lasts about a week. The apogee can come on the very last day, and before that, the woman is simply naughty and whimpering.
