Hello everyone! The phrase "male adultery" in our days is familiar. But women often do the same. Usually for their spouses, this becomes a real shock. A wife, just like her husband, may not look for a new partner for life, but just wants, as in her youth, to be the subject of passion and adoration, to receive signs of attention. Therefore, she surrounds herself with fans and even sometimes gets a lover. This is done in order to feel like a woman in the full sense of the word. It is by no means her intention to leave the family. Let's talk today about why a wife cheats, but does not leave the family.
Causes of betrayal, not related to the desire to leave the family
The husband is trying to understand why, in this case, his wife deceived him. The most common reason is:
- revenge for;
- his inattention;
- boredom;
- lack of a full-fledged intimate life;
- jealousy;
- mistreatment;
- scandals;
- chilling between spouses;
- adventure seeking, etc.
It often happens that a lover is much higher than a woman in terms of position in society and material wealth.
Quite often, he himself does not seek to start a family. In this case, such a connection is usually a way for a woman to receive material assistance, make profitable connections and feel like a significant person. She is not at all going to leave her husband for this man, understanding the precariousness of such a relationship.
It is not uncommon for a woman to remain married because of children, she is held back by a material issue, she has nowhere to live after a divorce, she continues to love her husband, or her professional career depends on him. All this firmly holds her close to him.
It happens that the impetus for the novel on the side is the betrayal of her husband. Then the wife simply agrees with the first admirer, not setting herself the goal of creating a strong relationship with him.
Usually, at the same time, she tries to tie him tighter and make him lose his head so that it becomes clear to her husband. She constantly awakens jealousy in him and fuels his suspicions. The goal in this case is precisely to strengthen family relationships, and not to destroy them. A spouse who is deceived or suspects adultery understands that he, too, is at risk of being alone, and the specter of divorce begins to loom before him. Therefore, he often changes his mind and stops communicating on the side.
Cheating can also happen when a woman feels forgotten and unloved. Then she enters into a relationship solely to increase self-esteem.
Sometimes she is not looking for a new husband, but simply needs a friend, but the relationship gets out of control. The partner often does not suit her in age and social status. But she does not leave him, because she needs mutual understanding.
Boredom and the monotony of family life are also a powerful incentive to change. For this reason, both men and women violate their obligations. A person feels alone, not needed.
If the second person in a couple does not find his individual niche, without losing touch with the family, then this state of affairs may well push him to treason. At the same time, a woman is not going to destroy her marriage, since entertainment on the side only helps her take empty time, feel loved and take revenge on her husband for inattention.
Often the void is formed after the children become adults and they no longer need the attention of their parents. Then the spouses, no longer connected by this powerful stimulus, begin to gradually move away from each other. At the same time, a woman suffers much more, as she is used to being necessary and constantly taking care of a child.
At this time, she is still quite young, but does not want to have other children or does not have the opportunity. Therefore, the vacant niche of a lack of warmth and attention is occupied by a lover who simply becomes an object of unspent maternal feelings. The husband remains the head of the family, the person on whom you can rely and with whom the woman is going to live all her life. And a friend just helps her to occupy the empty space. At the same time, he often turns out to be a victim of such relationships, so behind the love and tenderness of a partner is not at all the desire to be together.
Often the cause of betrayal, after which the wife remains with her husband, is a casual relationship. It may occur during:
- trips to the resort;
- business trips;
- visits to a nightclub;
- corporate party;
- visiting;
- train travel;
- intrigues at work;
- drinking etc.
Fear of uncertainty
A woman rarely decides to cheat if she does not like her new chosen one. It happens that she even happens to be really strongly in love with him. The psychology of the female sex is such that its representatives rarely agree to sexual relations that are not seriously supported by genuine feelings.
Therefore, as a rule, a woman has a fairly close relationship with her lover. The most common reason why she nevertheless does not leave the family is the doubt that a better future awaits her.
This happens if the new chosen one:
- poor;
- does not have permanent housing;
- deprived of a permanent job;
- does not inspire deep confidence;
- lower in social status than her husband;
- has other girlfriends;
- does not show deep love;
- does not make joint plans;
- much younger;
- is not going to marry her, etc.
It happens that a woman meets the man of her dreams, but he is in no hurry to commit himself, or she understands that she is dealing with a frivolous person. In this case, no feelings are worth the risk of being completely alone. Then the wife chooses the option when the relationship with her lover continues, and the husband is chosen as the rear.
For women, a relationship with a man on the side is always a rather serious test. Unlike the stronger sex, they rarely start an affair just for fun, especially if they are already married. Therefore, their reluctance to leave the family is usually due to the fact that the new conditions are worse or simply not defined.
The psychology of a woman requires that she be close to her beloved man. But, if the spouse is no longer such, and the lover cannot give her anything, then she finds herself in a rather difficult situation.
In addition, divorce is generally a very painful thing. And the longer the marriage lasted, the more difficult this procedure will be. Not only that, for a woman, this means reputational loss. Very often, she also loses a strong social status, respect for loved ones, a sense of security.
Therefore, even if she leaves the family, she will not rush. The woman will wait. If the husband proves his love and devotion to her, then she will most likely simply break the connection on the side. And if the lover provides her with invincible evidence of the seriousness of his intentions, demonstrates his financial viability and willingness to accept her children, then she may decide to divorce.
More often, the woman continues to keep both men near her, doing nothing.
In our time, the fair sex does a lot on a par with men. Unfortunately, in terms of betrayal, they are also almost not inferior to them. The reasons may be completely different, but a woman spends time on the side in a purely manly way, while maintaining her family. This is definitely a destructive way of life. Such an act is not able to improve her own existence, the well-being of her children or elderly parents.
Any betrayal is a consequence of irresponsibility and immaturity, no matter how old the person is. Therefore, no behavior of the husband can serve as an excuse for the emergence of a relationship on the side. If there is no desire to start a new family with a loved one in order to completely share his life, then such a connection “without consequences” can completely destroy an already fragile marriage.
Now you know why the wife cheats, but does not leave the family. If you have experience in a similar matter, or you have an opinion, leave comments!
Female adultery is a very common phenomenon. In our society, it is generally accepted that wives cheat much less often than husbands. But, let's not forget that men tend to exaggerate their victories, and women - to underestimate.
Many women, having cheated on their soul mates, carefully hide this fact, since they do not at all intend to get divorced and destroy the family. In order to understand why the wife is cheating, but does not leave the family, it is necessary to find out the reasons for such behavior. And only having determined the “root of the problem”, you can begin to solve it and normalize family relations.
The main reasons for female infidelity
The nature of female adultery is quite multifaceted. It is more complex and radically different from the male. Here, “instincts” play a very insignificant role, and the lack of self-realization, attention, dissatisfaction with moral and physical desires is of paramount importance. In most cases, the reason for this behavior of a woman is her husband.
There are a number of reasons why a wife cheats, but does not leave the family
Indifference.
Over time, women become offended that their husbands do not pay them due attention. The fact is that a man is a hunter by nature. It is important for him to win the girl, to catch her in his nets and seek favor. But, after marriage, most often, children appear. And at this moment, the man begins to look at his wife with different eyes. Often he loses interest in her and ceases to notice his wife. The wife gets the feeling that she is no longer interesting to her husband, and from a once sexy and attractive girl, she has become for her husband - just the mother of his child. A woman feels indifference very well. And at that moment, another man appears on the horizon, who finds common topics for conversation, shows interest in her family problems, listens attentively to her plans for life. Here is the first reason why wives cheat on their husbands - women need an emotional connection with a man.
Why doesn't she leave? The reason is the same: children, family, husband as such. Often this is explained by the phrase: "Well, where will I leave him." And really, where? It is possible that she still loves him, is glad to see him, even plans a joint future, but with one caveat - she still needs emotions and attention, and it doesn’t matter where she gets them.
Advice for husbands: often show small signs of attention to your soul mates. Stop living according to the scheme: "Flowers - for March 8, perfume - for a birthday, a certificate - for the new year." Listen to her, pamper her, spend time together.
Family problems.
Women, agreeing to get married, assume that their husbands will solve financial and domestic issues. But in reality, the situation develops in a completely different way, which leads to a constant, protracted conflict. Do not blame all the sins of men. If there are problems in the family, then the fault lies with both spouses. But the husband is mostly to blame. He becomes the head of the family and must take on many difficult tasks. In real life, it is women's shoulders that are responsible for solving all domestic problems. And if a man cannot or does not want to cope with his duties, the woman begins to look for a replacement for him. This is another reason why wives cheat on their husbands.
What is the point of keeping the family together in this case? The cheating wife decides to remain a wife, because she is already used to such a model of life, she knows how to “carry everything on herself”, sometimes she even feels sorry for her husband or feels her duty to stay with him, being afraid to leave her at a difficult moment in life.
Advice for husbands: the phrase: “Your problems, solve it yourself” can lead to disastrous consequences. Some of the options that a woman chooses to solve her problems will not please men. Therefore, never refuse to help your wives and support them in every possible way. And if you cannot solve some problem at the moment, then you need to tell your wife in detail about your experiences and ask her to wait a bit. At the very least, show your spouse that you are interested and willing to help.
Dissatisfaction with sexual life.
The notion that sex is only for men is deeply mistaken. Intimate intimacy with your partner is just as necessary for women as for their soul mates. In women after 30 years, the period of greatest sexual activity begins, therefore, on the basis of intimacy, once every few months, a woman's desire to cheat on her husband is strengthened (and often realized).
The decision to stay with her husband is most often due to love and. There is a clear internal distinction between family and sexual life. Sometimes, flirting, women begin to deny the fact of infidelity, explaining this by physical needs that the husband cannot satisfy.
Advice for husbands: not only women should look for options on how to satisfy their men, diversify their sex life, what to make new. Men should also think about how they can make a woman happier and intimate relationships more interesting.
Unfounded jealousy.
Obsessive thoughts materialize. This applies to any area of human life. For example, if a husband constantly unreasonably suspects his wife of cheating, most likely she will cheat on him over time. This will happen because of resentment and offended dignity. Then you can look for a long time for an answer to the question of why your beloved wife cheated, or vice versa, with annoying glee to admit that he was right (“I knew it”). Only, perhaps, the man is involved in the betrayal of his wife in this case?
Women don't cheat out of spite. But you can push her to change. Often, after cheating, for this reason, a woman remains in the family because of an elementary unwillingness to change something in life. There is a husband, there is a lover - everything suits her. And the fact that the husband is aware of the betrayals - he wanted it so much!
Advice for husbands: try to trust your soulmate and respect her personal life. Even if she is constantly surrounded by men, this does not mean at all that she will certainly begin to cheat with them. Whether a wife will change or not, does not depend on whether her husband will be jealous of her and check his every step. It is important to understand here: if she wants to, she will change, no matter how targeted control she is.
Monotony can destroy even the strongest relationship.
At the beginning of a relationship, men beautifully look after their chosen ones. They come up with a lot of entertainment to surprise a companion, to win her over. But after the wedding, men calm down, and signs of attention become monotonous and predictable. Days smoothly flow into monotonous and boring years. As a result, women begin to think about how to make their lives more interesting. And if there are no initiatives from the husband, then why not accept an offer from an interesting gentleman?
There are two reasons to stay in the family in this case: love and a habit formed over the years. Such a woman lives with former warm memories and common family plans for the future. In the present, she “just gets new emotions.”Advice to men: if you think why your wife is cheating, but does not leave you, analyze your life together. Bring some unpredictability into your relationship. Try coming home from work with flowers, or suggest not cooking dinner today, but going to a restaurant. Do not turn your life into a dull swamp.
No matter how strong and self-sufficient a woman is, she will subconsciously expect attention, care and support from a man. And if you are also romantic and unpredictable, she will not even think about changing. Because... why?
How do women interpret cheating?
Many wives cheat on their husbands, but are completely unprepared to divorce them. They simply succumb to momentary weakness, which is a breath of fresh air for them. To the question why a cheating wife does not leave her husband, several answers can be given:
- She still loves her husband.
- The family has children or joint property that binds the couple.
In any case, a man who has learned about his wife's infidelity must first of all calm down, find the reasons for female infidelity and try to understand why the cheating wife does not leave him. If the reason is love, then it makes sense to try to forgive such a spouse. If the reason is only in children or in an apartment (joint mortgage, public opinion, material and moral convenience), then it makes no sense to save the marriage.
Why did your beloved wife cheat, if you did everything for her, you can during a frank conversation with your soulmate. Try not only to listen to what she tells you, but also to understand her words (without psychos, outright accusations, condemnations, and especially assault). Some logical conclusions about the cause of infidelity can be drawn from non-verbal signs. Look at how she behaves, watch her gestures, facial expressions, posture during a conversation. All decisions made regarding divorce or the preservation of the family must be carefully considered. After talking with the cheater, take a few days to think and distance yourself from her. Such behavior will allow both partners to adequately get out of an unpleasant situation.
Moreover, as a rule, men change, and women become the initiators of divorce. But to take such a step is not at all easy ...
The children have grown up, I don’t want to grow old, everything is familiar and boring at home .... And here he is - a demon in the ribs. Treason. Young mistress. However, the number of divorces after marriage does not equal the number of infidelities. The point, as a rule, is that for a husband this is an attempt to have fun and feel young. But in no case is there a desire to build new long-term relationships, to again experience the “diaper period” and the crisis of everyday habituation of the spouses.
“Old” wives, having learned about the betrayal of a man, are also in no hurry to get divorced, fearing loneliness, the dreary division of jointly acquired property, and not wanting to rebuild their personal lives. All these ups and downs are taking place against the backdrop of a steadily growing number of girls dreaming of marrying older men. To fulfill their dream, they need to be tenacious and persistent.
For a man to find happiness and peace, it is important to diagnose himself in time: “am I having fun” or “finally found true love”? And what should wives do - reconcile, make scandals or file for divorce?
Watch your health
It is at the age of 20 that they don’t die from betrayal, and after 5 days, having roared enough and dropped 3 kilos from suffering, they find a new boyfriend. At 40-50 everything is already different. Because it’s not a person who has known him for a maximum of a year, but a relative who has been with you for twenty years “both in sorrow and in joy.”
In such a situation, betrayal hits not only the emotional state, it exhausts physically. Indeed, as a rule, the husband is not in a hurry to leave for a young mistress, preferring to live in two houses. A smart wife understands everything quickly and without further ado. And this knowledge, coupled with indecision (when not only the husband is in no hurry to get a divorce, but the wife is also slow, waiting “when he goes crazy”), undermines health from day to day. And so for several months or years ...
Diseases begin - oncological, cardiovascular, neurological, allergic. And the more a woman worries, the more she gets sick. And the more sick - the more worried. It turns out a vicious circle, from which it is necessary to escape. That's just how?
Well, for starters, to understand - life does not end with the betrayal of a man. This is his step "to the side", not yours. So let him worry! And you need to live. For yourself, for your children. And for his sake, because in 90% of cases, when a young lover gets tired of moral throwing (remember the movie "Autumn Marathon") "daddies", and she sets a condition for him: me or his wife, he chooses his wife ...
And in order to live you need ... that's right, health!
Therefore, “surviving” betrayal, first of all, you need to find a way not to waste your nerves on it:
And in order to think less about what your spouse is doing (or not doing), you just need to find something to your liking:
- do yoga,
- charity,
- learn a new computer program
- go to driving school
- take up dancing,
- sign up for rock climbing.
The advice is not idle. First, when a person is busy with himself, he has less opportunity to think about others. Secondly, in any club / section after 2-3 classes you will be a member of a new team, you will make new acquaintances and friends. In general, look for ways to love yourself rather than hate him.
No need to look for someone to blame
The standard set of women's accusations of adultery is as follows: “Here he is a bastard. All men need only one! And this, young, no shame, no conscience, decided to build her happiness on someone else's misfortune!
True, in fairness it should be noted that the wife often declares herself guilty, saying that she did not take care of herself enough, did not cook very tasty, did not caress very passionately ... Only after a fight they don’t wave their fists. And it was always necessary to walk around the house in beautiful home clothes, and not in a greasy leaky bathrobe and follow the manicure / makeup, and, most importantly, your words and behavior, and not when “the fried rooster pecked”. And a new haircut on a head clogged with “old” (envy of her youth, hatred of him - a traitor, etc.) thoughts will look, frankly, without effect ...
And the fact that “men only need one thing” can be blamed on them, or you can use it. But in a smart way, in our way, in a feminine way ... Again, the method works before trouble knocked on the house in the guise of a young, progressive mistress in this regard.
On one of the Internet forums we read: “I understood one thing: sex for a man is the main thing in life. Well, they don't feel like men without it, and that's good. This means that we need to help them demonstrate this natural function of theirs as often as possible. Now I often take the initiative in my own hands (on the principle that one should not wait for mercy from nature). And what do you think, the husband is now flying on wings, a million plans and ideas. Yes, I myself began to get a lot of pleasure. You just need to force yourself to change your attitude towards this side of life, and for many, the problem of betrayal will disappear by itself. We are 49 years old, I regret that I did not attach importance to this before.
So the betrayal of a man, like any disease, is easier to prevent than to treat ... But! If it has already happened, there is no need to go to extremes. For example, it’s magnanimous to “forgive everything”, “get into position”, try to convince yourself that mistresses also have a hard life, and the reveler hubby is already “tormented by conscience” ...
It is best to understand yourself and make the main choice for yourself - either be able to forgive, step over betrayal, learn from it and never blame it, or - do not be afraid to start life from scratch. And do not waste your health on worries about frequent “business trips” and “night shifts” of your spouse. When the decision is firm and without any “if only, if only”, the action plan for its implementation will not be so difficult to draw up ...
Needless to say, the betrayal of a beloved husband becomes a real tragedy for his wife. Convinced of the betrayal of a dear person, a woman suffers and ... cannot decide what to do: immediately file for divorce, reconcile and endure, blame herself for "not holding back"? To understand the causes of male infidelity and choose the right behavior, consider this problem from the point of view of astrology.
So if your husband...
Aries
Most likely, adultery for him is a breath of freedom and novelty. Tired of the monotony of gray everyday life, he suddenly decides to paint his life in brighter colors and ... can break loose. Unfortunately, Aries is a very addicted person, goes headlong into his hobbies, sees only one goal. But he is a terrible owner and jealous, this fact must be used. If you give him reasons for jealousy, even completely innocent ones, he will instantly turn his attention to his lawful spouse. To do this, you don’t need to change for real - it’s enough to come home with flowers a couple of times without explaining the origin of the bouquet. Or ask one of the colleagues to walk home, so that the spouse becomes a witness of this fact. Another way to attract the attention of an Aries husband again is to change the hair color and clothing style to a very bright one and often go out with your beloved “in the light”.
Taurus
Representatives of this sign do not often decide to cheat on their wife - they appreciate the usual order of things and hate emotional shaking. Taurus “sin” with infidelity only when they feel a lack of love for their person and try to make up for it on the side. So the “prevention” of infidelity will be increased care: you need to surround your Taurus husband with comfort, showing attention to the smallest details - a delicious dinner and a cozy house where he is always expected, etc. What if the betrayal has already happened? You should not hush up the problem and pretend that you don’t know anything - it’s better to immediately honestly and “head-on” discuss the current situation, outlining a plan for overcoming it together. It is desirable that such a conversation take place without a violent showdown. If the offense does not allow you to control yourself, it is better to transfer him to an appointment with a family psychologist.
Twins
This frivolous intellectual all the time wants new communication, new acquaintances, which easily develop from friendly into intimate ones. Moreover, in the case of a betrayal of a Gemini husband, it is simply useless to apply for a divorce: a new hobby will pass faster than you are going to reach the registry office. But there is also a sad fact - even if this sin happened to him for the first time, then most likely not the last. Gemini looking for nature, and nothing can be done about it. The only way to keep him is to add romanticism to the marital relationship. And this means making dates from time to time, appearing at home only “in full dress” (and not in a bathrobe), sharing with him all about his hobbies and passions - from fishing to swimming in the hole.
Crayfish
It is not for nothing that they say "in a still pool ...". Vulnerable and sensitive, homely and child-loving Cancers often indulge in all serious. The reason is simple - they are driven to infidelity by great sexuality and a powerful instinct for procreation, although they themselves will never admit it. At the same time, Cancer never leaves his legal spouse, but ... continues to communicate on the side. The first effective means of returning the unfaithful to the bosom of the family is the usual scandal (the Cancer husband does not tolerate raised voices and will be ready to agree to any condition of an angry wife). Magical love spells will also help a lot. And after peace has reigned, do not forget to make the intimate life of your couple brighter and more diverse.
a lion
He loves when women conquer him and fight for his attention. Some flattering speeches from your rival are enough for the spouse to turn off the true path. Another common reason for lion cheating is the desire to show off among friends, to prove one's "special masculinity." And in order to destroy the side connection of the husband-Leo, you need to hit the same target as your rival - according to his pride. Pretend that you are “not in the know” and try to prove that your mistress spoke badly about him: “I accidentally found out that your secretary Petrova made fun of your appearance among friends” or “They say she always chooses miserable lovers for herself.” After that, the secret union will lose its former charm for the husband. If the name of the opponent is unknown, fight her with your virtues - for this you will need to become “more promising” than she is: slimmer, well-groomed, smarter and more educated.
Virgo
Men of this sign are faithful to their wives when they are confident in the strength of the marital relationship. And if the wife behaves too freely, often disappears, flirts with other men - how can one not look for a more “safe haven”? So the “deceived” wife should first of all change her own behavior. So what is next? Most of the life of a Virgo husband is spent at work. Here you should look for his new passion and be sure to get to know her in order to draw the attention of a super-critical spouse to the opponent’s shortcomings - “Darling, have you noticed how uneven her legs are?” (just pretend you don't know about their connection). Even if everything is in order with a girl with a figure, the husband will definitely “hook” with his consciousness for this thought and she will never give him peace. Another option is to insist that the spouse change jobs, moving to a purely male team.
scales
He is able to cheat on his wife only when he really fell in love - he never starts casual relationships. But before worrying, the spouse must make sure that there is a good reason for this - Libra men are able to maintain a purely platonic relationship with a new lover. Of course, not everyone will be warmed by the idea that a legal husband is walking under the moon with another woman, even if the matter does not go beyond reading poetry. But what can you do with a lover? Alas, nothing! It remains only to wait for him to decide how to live on. Meanwhile, look for a worthy replacement for him.
Scorpion
On the outside he is a cynic, but at heart he is a gullible romantic. He is attracted by the mystery, the inaccessibility of unknown women, while the wife is already known and does not represent any secret. And if Scorpio meets a lady on his way who gives him a mystical sense of mystery (even if it only seems), he is able to cheat on his wife without much thought. It is useless to influence his conscience and consciousness, in such situations they "rest". Come from the side of the unconscious! Concentrate his attention on the memories of joint happiness: gather old friends and girlfriends, arrange an evening of pleasant memories, review the photos in which your couple was captured before the wedding. Or arrange a trip to the places where he fell in love with you, where you spent your honeymoon. After such psychological tricks, the spouse will turn the power of new love to the "stranger" back on you.
Sagittarius
Constant betrayal of his wife and the presence of a mistress, alas, can be a way of life for him. This is just self-affirmation, not a true need for love. If the Sagittarius spouse is confident in his abilities and himself, everything will be in order! If he feels that he cannot achieve the cherished ideals in his work in any way, or the old business has already become boring for him ... he “gains self-respect” by having a mistress. To get rid of the bad habit of the fiery anemone, oh, how not easy. Try to bring to his attention that extramarital affairs are a sign of bad taste and degrade man's dignity. More often slip articles about celebrities who observe family values. If you and your husband have a mutual friend, let him talk to the unfaithful: in the case of Sagittarius, a sense of shame (not conscience) is a powerful weapon.
Capricorn
Surprisingly, he can make a connection on the side, convincing himself that this is how it should be. So to say to the big boss the mistress is "put" by status. Fortunately, this stupid thought does not often occur to the Capricorn husband, but if it does come, hold on wife! A new relationship can last for years, gradually growing into a second family. And he is simply not able to leave any of the women - responsibility, you understand! In his case, gossip and harsh public opinion will be the most effective. And most of all, Capricorn is afraid of being ridiculed. As soon as the subordinates begin to giggle behind their backs, and the boss makes jokes right in the face (both are quite easy to organize), he will become thoughtful and will definitely decide the issue in favor of the “first” family.
Aquarius
We have to admit that treason is the second nature of this sign. You will not find a more wrong type in the whole world. Do you want to continue your life together? Learn to turn a blind eye to his late absence and the new smell of perfume from the jacket - of course, women's. True (regardless of your long-suffering) Aquarius will someday decide to break the burdensome bonds of Hymen and live a free life. If you want to have the final say, file for divorce. If hope is still glimmering, respond to betrayal with mutual infidelity, but only to console your pride. It's unlikely you'll get past him.
Fishes
Most of his free time he needs solitude and tranquility. If at home the “fish” is waiting for his own quiet corner - an easy chair in front of the TV or a cozy sofa, he will never cheat on his wife (more precisely, he will not cheat on his familiar sofa and armchair). But if you put a load of duties on him, don’t wait home early - he will find another calm sofa. If you stop “pulling” your beloved husband over trifles and let him be lazy for 1 hour a day, he will soon miraculously move back to his familiar place. And another method to firmly tie him only to your sofa is to have a new joint offspring, without waiting for your rival to decide on this.
In general, look at the stars and take everything with a smile.
Be happy!
Unfortunately, there are no married couples that are insured against adultery. A cozy home, a warm bed and moral and ethical standards are not a guarantee of unconditional male fidelity. If such a “trouble” happened in your family, do not rely only on emotions, but listen to your heart and our advice.
Keep your dignity and don't lose your presence of mind
The first thing that any woman experiences when she learns about her husband's infidelity is a shock! It is simply impossible to remain calm and indifferent in such a state. But no matter how hard it is, always be patient. It's not easy, well, what can you do, but such a position is the most correct. Take a couple of deep breaths, drink a cup of coffee with an incredibly tasty piece of chocolate, and bring yourself into balance.
Do not be frank about the secret
Women are by nature very emotional and categorical, but do not rush to tell everyone and everyone about what happened in your family. When everything gets better, and it will be so, awkwardness in relationships with friends and acquaintances, and even more so with relatives, will remain for a long time. The world has turned upside down just for the two of you, let it remain between you. What to do next is up to you both.
Don't dwell on thoughts of cheating. Distract yourself with something positive, go where there are a lot of people, play sports, take your child to the circus: in general, lead a normal social life.
Don't rush to do stupid things
There is no need to seek a meeting with a mistress. Why resort to external comparisons and clarification of relationships? Be above it. If the passion was fleeting, do not provoke your husband to take more serious steps by threatening to break up or divorce. And yet, in retaliation for infidelity, do not rush into the arms of your old admirer.
Reproaches, scandals, sobs are simply meaningless. A traitor's awareness of his own mistake and wrongdoing is already great. There is a struggle in his soul about how to live and what to do next. It is possible, and even necessary, to play on guilt, but do not flirt, so as not to completely alienate your husband.
Don't forgive, but have mercy
Where will a man go when, in a fit of anger, they categorically show him the door. Of course, to the one who will regret, calm, surround with warmth and care, give a wonderful night - to your rival!
Do not drive your husband to your mother or into the corridor on the couch - returning from there is much more difficult than you think. Ask yourself what went wrong? How long has your husband had a relationship, how serious is it, or is it just a random fling? And most importantly, understand your feelings.
Don't take different roads
Answer the question, after all that has happened - what exactly do you want? Will divorce help put emotions in order, will such a decision bring the desired relief? And if children, because they suffer the most?
Do not rush to part, no matter how hard and painful it is - even if the heart is torn into small pieces, and there is no more strength to hold back bitter tears. Think, if your feelings have not cooled down yet, and your husband is a good and caring father, there is a chance that everything will work out. After all, it is known that resentment and forgiveness return the sharpness of novelty to relations between spouses.
